Post by urbantangleweed on Dec 4, 2018 17:33:50 GMT 1
At the touch of her lips, it grew long and swollen. I sighed as she squeezed and pulled expertly. It was the best balloon giraffe I'd ever seen.
Staring at her naked body, I asked what she wanted. She told me to go for something between a smack and a stroke. So I went for a smoke.
'How do you feel about using toys in the bedroom?' she asked, 'Fine,' I said, 'But I can't see how we're going to fit a Scalextric in here.'
Her body tensed and quivered as she felt wave after wave flow through it. I probably should've told her about the new electric fence.
As I lay there on the floor, my naked body covered in treacle and whipped cream, I heard those inevitable words . . . 'Clean up on aisle 3.'
Frantically I tore off her dress, bra and knickers. My heart was racing but I just managed to close the wardrobe door before she got home.
'Hurt me!' she begged, leaning over the dining table expectantly.
'OK,' I replied, 'The meat's too dry and the vegetables are overcooked.'
She leaned over the kitchen table and said 'Smack that bottom, smack it hard!'
, 'I am,' I said, 'But the ketchup just won't come out.'
They asked me to smear their naked bodies with the produce from my herb garden but I just couldn't do it. Too many women, not enough thyme.
Her body trembled and shook.'I can't wait any longer, do it now!' she cried. 'OK,' I said and got the winter duvet from the airing cupboard.
Staring at her naked body, I asked what she wanted. She told me to go for something between a smack and a stroke. So I went for a smoke.
'How do you feel about using toys in the bedroom?' she asked, 'Fine,' I said, 'But I can't see how we're going to fit a Scalextric in here.'
Her body tensed and quivered as she felt wave after wave flow through it. I probably should've told her about the new electric fence.
As I lay there on the floor, my naked body covered in treacle and whipped cream, I heard those inevitable words . . . 'Clean up on aisle 3.'
Frantically I tore off her dress, bra and knickers. My heart was racing but I just managed to close the wardrobe door before she got home.
'Hurt me!' she begged, leaning over the dining table expectantly.
'OK,' I replied, 'The meat's too dry and the vegetables are overcooked.'
She leaned over the kitchen table and said 'Smack that bottom, smack it hard!'
, 'I am,' I said, 'But the ketchup just won't come out.'
They asked me to smear their naked bodies with the produce from my herb garden but I just couldn't do it. Too many women, not enough thyme.
Her body trembled and shook.'I can't wait any longer, do it now!' she cried. 'OK,' I said and got the winter duvet from the airing cupboard.
